Valenti Positive Howard Hiring A Total Disaster For Michigan Following Introductory Presser

After hearing Howard stumble around and avoid questions at his presser, he’s convinced that Michigan made a huge mistake

The Valenti Show
May 31, 2019 - 3:33 pm

When the University of Michigan announced that they would be hiring former Wolverine Juwan Howard as their new head basketball coach, Mike Valenti wasn’t a fan.

After Howard’s introductory press conference on Thursday, Valenti is convinced that the hire is an absolute disaster, especially after hearing Howard's answer to what his coaching philosophy will be. 

“Well, it still remains to be seen,” said Howard, “but I can tell you this, one thing about me is I’m humble and I don’t have all the answers. We are going to try and figure out solutions together. My staff, the players will be active participants in finding the solutions. We will create this identity together and we will have fun doing it too.”

Howard dodging the question and giving a non-answer had Valenti irate.

“Translation: I have no idea what I’m doing. We’re just going to wing it. SPITBALLIN’! We’re going to have FUN! What?! You’re job when you accept the coaching job at the University of Michigan is to display leadership, to display the ability to be a public speaker. It’s to be able to lay out a plan, instill confidence. You do not get a chance at a first impression. First impression? What is your philosophy? Err, uh, eee, dunno... He didn’t take over the Campbell University Fighting Camels, he didn’t over the Coastal Carolina Chanticleers, he didn’t take the head coaching job at UTEP. You are the head coach of the University of Michigan. You played for two national titles the last seven years. What is your coaching philosophy? Fart noise.”

It didn’t end there. After Howard's philosophy got questioned, the focus turned to his path to the University and how he got hired with essentially zero experience.

“But wait, Juwan wasn’t done. Juwan already knows people are doubting him and his experience. Yeah you have to start somewhere. Like high school. Like the G-League. Like D-II. Like low-major. Like mid-major. Like major, but not powerhouse. Sorry Juwan you skipped, not just a bunch of steps, you skipped all of them. ‘Hey guys, I know you’re unfairly doubting me’ cause that’s the tone he took, ‘but you have to start somewhere!’”

Warde Manuel, the athletic director at the University of Michigan, took the media question his experience, or lack thereof, as an attack.  

“But wait, but wait, there’s more! Because Warde Manuel decided he was going to get up on the dance floor and show everybody how it’s done. Warde Manuel, not pleased. Ward Manuel wants to chastise. And Ward Manuel thinks that if you criticize the fact, by the way Ward, you said you’re number one priority was college coaching experience and 10 minutes later you hired a guy with, let me check my notes, NONE! But Ward’s angry. Listen to this explanation and I promise you, you’re skill will cave in.”

Here’s the quote from Manuel, in regard to Howard’s experience.

“Some of those coaches,” Ward said as he pointed into the crowd, “have 30-plus years of experience and they still questioned with everything they do. So don’t you worry about it. The questions will come in your first game and your 1,000th game.”

“When I heard that,” said Valenti, “honestly, I had to make sure my head was attached. You said college experience was your No. 1 priority, then you pivoted and hired a dude with none. Now your pissed that people said all those things about him not having experience. Oh, what are those things called? FACTS. They’re called facts, Ward. Your coach has never coached. Fact. I have a big nose. Fact. How do you get angry at the media because they wrote the truth. But then, you’re explanation is, ‘well, lots of experienced guys have lost their jobs in the last couple years too, you know!’ HUH!?”

Just when Valenti thought that this whole hiring situation couldn’t get worse, the introductory press conference reassured him more that it was much worse than he thought.

“I have never been more convinced that this hire is a total disaster. You went from the greatest coach in school history. You went from one of the best coaches in America to hiring someone with zero experience who showed up the podium who couldn’t speak publicly and, oh by the way, couldn’t lay out his plan because err, ahh, eee, there isn’t one. Then you get chastised by an AD because you, wait for, had the audacity to say the truth. You hired a dude with no track record, no experience. Oh,that’s okay because experienced people lose their jobs.”

Valenti also wants you to save your time telling him that his tone would be much different if it was his alma mater Michigan State making this decision.

“If it happened at Michigan State I’d be more angry. If it happened at Michigan State I’d be burning this studio down. If you think I’d react differently if Michigan State did this, you don’t know me.”